Sunday, July 14, 2013

Post Apocalyptic Dreams Are the Best!

I had a very lucid and vivid dream last night, here's how it went down.

In a post apocalyptic  world, the few humans still alive find themselves in constant battle with both zombies and an alien race.  Many humans live in small communities behind fortified walls, hidden from their enemies.  In one such town, the only people to venture beyond the walls are well trained in combat.  One of these groups has just headed out on a mission to find food and other much needed supplies.

The group of five- two women and three men- head for a city they have not searched before.  The city is over twenty miles from camp and it will be a dangerous and long trip to get there, but there is no where else to look, all the usual closer places are all tapped out. 

The group surprisingly encounters very little trouble on the way to the new city, a few zombies - easily taken down-  and no aliens.  When they arrive at the city it is obvious that it has been nearly completely decimated, only a handful of buildings are left standing, and even they are in bad shape.  The group heads in and gets to work searching the rubble for useful supplies.

While searching, they encounter many zombies and take them all down without much trouble.  The group finds a good stash of canned foods; fruit, mixed vegetables, chili, and refried beans.  They also find a nurses station at a high school that still has some basic first aid supplies that haven't been raided.

On their way out, they encounter a lone alien.  It is a huge one, extremely strong, agile, and carrying a gun and sword.  The group has some trouble taking down the alien, they put up a long, exhausting fight and are finally able to kill the monster.  They sustain minor injuries and lose a member of the group, one of the women.

The survivors head back to their vehicle but the loud fight has attracted more zombies and they have to hurry away or else waste more time fighting and risk attracting even more enemies.  The one woman left in the group stumbles across a litter of puppies.  The first thing she thinks is that they could make a hearty meal, but then she notices they are starving and weak.  Their mother must have been killed or taken some time ago.  She gathers up the four puppies and quickly heeds her team mates calls to get her butt in the car.

On the way back to camp the woman examines the puppies more closely and deduces that they must be husky mixes.  They will need to be nursed back to health and raised to adult hood before they can be eaten.  One of the puppies dies before they make it back to camp.

The woman spends some time raising the surviving three puppies and ends up falling in love with them.  Instead of turning them into meals, she trains them to be warrior dogs and takes them on missions where they prove to be invaluable fighters and search dogs (they can sniff out food and munitions).  She gives one of the puppies to a young woman in camp who shows potential for becoming a battler, and she gives a puppy to one of her teammates, the husband of the woman they lost the day they found the puppies.  She keeps one pup for herself.

Thursday, July 11, 2013

Yes, it's broken, but don't try to fix it!

Why is it that the people you most want to talk to, the ones you want to confide in, are always the most difficult to?  They just don't care to listen, and they tend to just make you feel worse than you did before you opened up to them.

Like most people, I don't find it easy to talk to anyone.  The one person I want to confide in just doesn't care.

Let me give you some general advise about "dealing" with a depressed, sad, stressed out, worried, or angry woman.  This is how MOST, not all, women are.

1. Never ignore her or turn her away.  You'll only make her louder and more upset, and now, if she wasn't before, she will blame you for making it worse than it was.

2.Address her emotional state first and foremost.  Acknowledge in a caring manner that she is upset (sad, angry, worried, etc.) but don't try to fix it, at least not unless she asks you to.  Just letting her know you understand how she feels should be enough to start to calm her.  Obviously, we all know women are profoundly emotional so isn't it just as obvious that we need to address that first?  Dealing with her feelings first will help to get them off her mind so she can think clearly.

3 Once the emotions are addressed and understood then you can move on to the root problem(s).  Saying something caring but neutral like, "What happened?"  Or, "Tell me about it."  Will let her know that you care and are interested.  Don't try to fix it! unless she asks you to.  Just listen. Make sure she has your full and undivided attention.  If you wander, she will pick up on it and you will not hear the end of it.

Side note: If a woman is pissed at you, please understand, what is masked by anger is really a broken heart.  You did something that made her feel one or all of the following: Unloved, ugly, unwanted, unimportant.  For instance, if she is trying to confide in you and you don't listen, it makes her feel unloved and unimportant to you. You might as well be telling her "You are worthless to me and I don't love you."

4. Never under any circumstances should you say things like, "I told you...", "What now.", or "What did I do?"  Or anything that will provoke anger or heartache or an argument.  Really, just shut the fuck up and listen.  It will end faster that way.  She just wants you to listen to her troubles, she just wants someone to care about her.  DO NOT TRY TO FIX IT! If you just listen to what she says and acknowledge her emotions, she will usually "fix it" herself.   You are her sounding board, not her hero.

5.Keep your mouth shut until she asks you something. When she asks you something, and she will (this is why you should have been listening all along), only answer the question and nothing more.  If it is an open ended question like, "What do you think?"  then, I'm sorry, you're on your own there because the answer depends on so many factors.  All I can say is to be as kind, loving, honest, and un-provoking as possible.  Don't try to fix it! unless she specifically asks you to.  "What do you think?" does not mean "What should I do?" or "Fix it for me."  It simply means "What do you think of the situation overall, what is your personal opinion?"  not, "How would you deal with it?"  Do you understand the difference?

P.S.:  Why do I keep saying not to try to fix it?  Because the whole point for a woman to confide in you is to have someone to let her know she is loved and important in some way.  It is natural for a man to feel like he should fix his woman's problems and be her hero because that is how most men are raised.  But if you try to address the problem then, in the woman's eyes, you are ignoring her.  You see, she came to you primarily because of her emotional issues, not because she has a problem she needs fixed.  She just wants you to help her feel better by acknowledging her feelings and listening to her bitch.

It is amazing how different men and women are, and it is no surprise that we clash so much.  I am quite aware that women are screwed up naturally, but this is how we are and it ain't gonna change any time soon.